


'long or thick?'

by CastelloFlare



Series: dirty uncles' tales [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Crack, Dirty Talk, Gen, i tried for some comedy, levi talks a lot here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-21
Updated: 2014-02-21
Packaged: 2018-01-13 07:09:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1217161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CastelloFlare/pseuds/CastelloFlare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Size does matter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	'long or thick?'

**Author's Note:**

> I would be happy if this ever entertained you in the slightest.

"So which do you prefer? Long or thick?"

Levi looked up from his reading to see Erwin looking down at him with a pretty serious expression on his face.

"... Are you really asking me this?"

"I just have to hear your opinion."

"Does it matter?"

"... You're the one who's gonna have to take it in your mouth--"

"Alright, I get it..." The Lance Corporal sighed and closed his book.

"So which is it?" Erwin asked, a little too enthusiastically.

“Well, long means I’ll need a longer time sucking it all in, although that’s not a bad thing,” Levi said after contemplating on the subject. “I just might feel it trailing down my throat, and I’m not sure if that will feel comfortable.”

“…” Erwin just looked at his subordinate without saying anything, so Levi took his silence as a cue to continue talking.

“If I choose thick, I’ll still be able to put it in my mouth no problem... Actually it all depends on how you do it anyway, I don't really care much because I'll just have to sit down, open wide, and take it all in."

“… I really want to know how you think about this. After all, I’m not sure if I have the qualities to actually do it,” Erwin said, and for the first time in his life, he looked as though he wasn’t sure of what to do. 

“I don’t want to do it in such a way that you won’t be able to walk – nor stand, for that matter – after you get a taste of it… After all, this is the first time, I want to make sure I’m doing things right.” He blushed lightly, and furrowed his eyebrows in deep thought, making Levi realize how important this was to the Commander.

“... Erwin,” the shorter man said after much thought. “Heating it up makes it thicker and sometimes, longer, so I don’t think you’ll have to worry so much about it. Just… let science do its work.”

Erwin brightened up at those words. “Is that so?”

“Yeah, it seems that Hanji and Mike have done it before, so…”

The Commander chuckled. “I guess it’s kind of embarrassing that my subordinates know more than I do regarding this matter.”

“That’s quite understandable.” Levi said. “You’re always so busy that you’ve never had the time to learn how to cook pasta.”

“I guess you’re right… Well, thank you for agreeing to taste my first shot at cooking, Levi.”

Seeing that Erwin was finally content, Levi went back to his book. “I get to eat for free, so I’m not complaining.”

**Author's Note:**

> Did that get your minds working? ... Teehee


End file.
